Family Update #15
Last night the ground was wet from the evening rain. Now it is dry. A few hours ago the sky was dark. Now it is a lighter shade of grey…almost a foggy white. When will it get dark again? In recent days the ever changing scenes from my window seem to serve as a reflection of my private thoughts and emotions. I see the sky tell of the coming weather and I wish my tears would give similar warning. They do not. They just come. And that’s ok, but it’s been hard to get my arms around all of my thoughts and feelings. The loss of dad has been hard…but it wasn’t until this morning that I realized that I have been struggling with the loss of the “role” I had been filling during this time in Dallas. I came home to help mom take care of dad. Dad is gone. What do I do now? Where do I focus this reactive energy? It’s like coming off of an extended adrenaline rush and then trying to figure out what’s next. Add the emotions and tears of loss and it’s an all out assault on normality. It’s just been hard to anticipate or plan a response. I’m just trying to roll with it and remember all that the Lord has done…that’s my north star – His faithfulness.
We continue to make plans for Friday. I am so thankful for a chance to join you in remembering dad and celebrating the Lord’s work in our family. Many of you have communicated regret for not being able to come to the memorial service on Friday…please, PLEASE know that we totally understand. We have had zero expectations in this process. In fact, to be perfectly honest with you, I have been blown away at the fact that some of you were planning, or trying to make plans, to come. I’ve never been through this but I didn’t think people would actually fly out or drive out for something like this. A close friend of mine, Reggie Goodin, has been out here since last Friday helping our family with anything and everything from cleaning out the kitchen cupboards and fixing a broken towel rack to laughing with mom and me during a stupid board game. He has been a reflection of what many of you have done in your own way, not least of which is praying. You have already blessed our family beyond our ability to communicate thanks. So please just keep praying and know that we are celebrating the Lord with you.
Arrangements have been made with the funeral home and dad will be cremated. Last week and weekend were full of the immediate “next steps” and we have since been slowly transitioning out of the urgent. I’ve never really thought about it before…urgency is distracting and strangely comfortable, but its comfort is deceptive. It merely delays the inevitable. Pain will have its place and I would rather embrace it than fight it. Again, “those who sow in tears will reap with joyful shouting.” I continue to pray that over our family. I can tell you that there have already been many moments of laughter and joy as we take these next steps. I have never known hope like this…at times I think it’s too good. Yes He is…the Lord is too good. DR comes in Thursday night and we are looking forward to spending time this weekend as a new family. I know he is looking forward to coming back and I can’t wait to give him a hug.
Here are last minute reminders/details concerning the memorial service on Friday:
- 2PM at Bent Tree Bible Fellowship (for directions please visit www.btbf.org)
- Dress is casual and comfortable
- A continued celebration and reception will be held at our house immediately following the service:
1930 Kentwood Lane Carrollton, TX 75007
If you would like to bring food to the reception (thank you so much J) please bring it to our house any time on Friday. We have a friend who will be at the house during the service for anyone dropping off food after 1PM. If you are making last minute travel arrangements please let me know and I will help you with transportation and finding a place to stay.
New Zealand?!
The story continues…
Tom Harriger and Student Venture have successfully laid the foundation for a mission trip to New Zealand in memory of dad. I won’t go into the full story now, but it was an international project to Hungary with Student Venture in the spring of 1994 that I believe the Lord used to spark changes in my life and in the life of our family. Dad’s dream had always been to go to New Zealand. We want to give local high school students a chance to experience what we hope to be a catalyst of God’s restorative work in their lives as well as the lives of students in New Zealand. If you would like to be a part of this please let us know…you can make checks payable to Student Venture and return them to our family. You may also send contributions to:
Student Venture
International Projects
100 Lake Hart Drive, Department 3200
Orlando, FL 32832
Please designate as “David Hanson Memorial Scholarship” and/or reference account number 2823662.
- If you would like to learn more about the significance of this trip and/or if you would like more information, please email me. (click on the page titled, “New Zealand,” located along the right margin of this blog)
This statement continues to be renewed each time I offer it to you – thank you. May the Lord bless you and give you a glimpse of how much joy and celebration He is providing…tears are wonderful. They point me back to Jesus, who promised that pain and death are not eternal. Why would I not celebrate?! Thank you for joining us…
Hopeful,
LV
(on behalf of the family)
2 Corinthians 5:1-10
almostHome
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